Developing a healthy relationship with birthmother

My husband and I feel truly blessed to have been chosen by our birthmother. We took our baby girl home a month after her birth, our birthmother was present at the time, handed her to us. I feel so grateful to her and my heart aches for her and her tremendous loss and struggle. We have established 4 visits a year and emails and phone calls often. Our baby is 5 months and we have had 2 visits, birthmother also came to baptism. Things seemed to be going well, like I could handle it all, but our last visit with her left me feeling a bit anxious and afraid. I know that she is still in the mourning process, but she repeatedly says that she is “living for” our daughter, and I am worried that I have been too “open” with her, in a way, misleading her as to her involvement in our daughter’s life. I hope to connect with other adoptive mothers who have gone through this and created a healthy relationship with their birthmother, I need some support please any advise would be greatly appreciated.

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