Several months after we adopted our daughter, we learned some very upsetting news about her birth family. Her birth mothers father is a registered sex offender, and sexually abused his daughter. We put a lot of effort into establishing a relationship with our daughters birth mother and our daughters birth family, but this mans presence in
visits, etc is very, very difficult for us to deal with.

It has become clear to us (my husband and i) that there are some serious issues with boundaries within the dynamic of our daughters birth family, and as such, it has been difficult navigate situations and visits.

We don’t regret the decision to pursue openness, but it does raise a question for us as adoptive parents. When she was pregnant, our daughters birth mother, had access to our home study, and an information she asked, we provided. Given the magnitude of her decision, as well as the welfare of her unborn child, this makes sense to us. However, I think more thought needs to be given about what type of information an adoptive family recieves before making the commitment/covenantal decision to intertwine their lives with people about whom we may have very little information.
Thoughts?