I had never considered adoption for my daughter prior to being admitted to the hospital. My baby had suddenly decided to come early, and I did not have any support.
In the hospital, I was interrogated by an adoption lawyer and agency. This was while in the hospital bed, the day after my daughter was born. [...]
Open Adoption Support
for families and individuals who support openness in adotion
We honor the connection adoptees have to both of their families. We recognize the love and joy as well as the losses and grief of adoption. We do not diminish one family in favor of another. We are flexible, understanding that needs and circumstances change. We set boundaries on the basis of what is best for our children.
We understand that open adoption looks like different things for different families.
Tag archives for closed
They haven’t even told my daughter she’s adopted. Now what?
Will I get my real family in trouble now that I’ve found them?
I am 13 years old and I recently found my real family online I love them so much and they love me. It is a closed adoption and my adpted parents forbid me but I want to know my sister and brothers and family. Will i get them in trouble if I keep talking to [...]
Why do so many think an open adoption is legally different than a closed?
Please note I am only speaking of the legalities involved in adoption here, NOT the relationships found within open adoption.
I am surprised at how many people seem to believe that ongoing contact means that adoption is somehow less permanent legally. Someone asked about it in the forum here, and I have gotten the question several times in real life “Since you have contact, what of she changes her mind in several years, can she take him back?”
It’s easy enough to explain that legally it doesn’t matter whether the adoption is open or closed -either type of adoption can be challenged/contested through legal channels with grounds like fraud or coercion- but those grounds must be evidenced in court. Otherwise, we are his parents in every legal sense.
There are other misconceptions as well; mostly from those skeptical that open adoption is emotionally healthy for DS or us (“Won’t he be terribly confused?”, “Don’t you feel threatened when she is around?” that kind of thing), and again I happily educate people on why we think open adoption is best for us, and what the research indicates…I understand that, especially from those for whom adoption in general is mysterious, but this legal thing confuses me.
Any others encounter similar misconceptions only about open adoption vs. closed?
Do most open adoptions eventually close?
I feel we, as an open adoption support group, need to address the oft quoted, but unverified and un-cited statistic: “an estimated that 80% of all open adoptions are closed”
I see this stat on blogs, forums, answer sites etc. and have been unable to find the source for this. You can Google search it to see the prevalence.
So, my questions are:
A) If it is a reliable, verified fact, what is the source so we can properly cite it, then what can we, as advocates of open adoption, do to change it?
B) If it was made up, or misinterpreted, how can we correct the perceptions of those that believe and repeat it?
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