We have two adopted children, both are open adoptions. With our first adoption, the birthmom was young and her mom was at all of our meetings. After our son was born and we visited, it was always with our birthmom and her mom, which we expected and were quite comfortable with. We now have a [...]
Open Adoption Support
for families and individuals who support openness in adoption
We honor the connection adoptees have to both of their families. We recognize the love and joy as well as the losses and grief of adoption. We do not diminish one family in favor of another. We are flexible, understanding that needs and circumstances change. We set boundaries on the basis of what is best for our children.
We understand that open adoption looks like different things for different families.
Tag archives for visits
Birth mom doesn’t want us to have contact with birth dad. Now what?
Our children’s birth mother has an extremely acrimonious relationship with our daughter’s birth father’s family. We actually only learned of it a few months ago after the adoption was finalized and are not certain exactly what has happened and why. But we do now know that the birth father’s mother & sister objected to the [...]
Will I get a call from a lawyer?
After 2+ years of fostering our neice(came to us at 3months due to bmother’s substance abuse problems, etc and now we’ve adopted her and she’s 3) The bmother settled on the day of her trial for an open adoption with us b/c her lawyer advised her heavily on doing so so she could at least [...]
How to I pull back from relationship with grandmother without hurting birth mom?
during the open adoption with my son, we have been helping his bmother find a job, get on her feet etc because shes showed that she is in fact trying.He was removed and her rights terminated. We agreed on 3 visits a year, but we do lots more. The problem now is her mom, she [...]
My son says, “I don’t like her”
I recently posted here about the possibility of meeting my son’s first mom for the first time at a public event. I appreciated all the encouragement I received and we did meet her. It was wonderful to see her in her element and felt very comfortable to me. After the performance, she greeted us warmly. [...]
What to do about disrespectful bmom?
Here is the problem that we are having… bdad’s mother wants to see our son but has no respect for us and bad mouths us and even calls and verbally abuses us if we are to busy ..she wants to see him like once a week…. bmom is 17 and is acts like my son [...]
Openness with families who are addicts?
So, are you all encouraging visits with small adopted children and their birth moms/dads? What if birth parents are addicts, not stable. Isnt this a lot for a child to have to deal with. Isnt it asking a lot of the adoptive parents to help their child shuffle their affections back and forth? It seems [...]
How many too many members of birthfamily for first visit?
We agreed to our first visit with our son’s birthfamily (birthmother and birthfamily are all who are listed in the agreement) being at 6 months after placement, which is coming up in May. The birthfather has told us now that they want to have the birthmother, him, his sister and her family of 4, his [...]
How can I prepare for a long visit?
First, let me say that my DD has an amazing birthfamily and they have truly given us so much more of a relationship than I ever dreamed we could have. We love them and want them to be involved in DD’s life as much as possible. We have done many, many day trips and other [...]
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